If I Ever Go Missing, Blame The Bush Administration

I swear, one of these days I will be hunted down and dragged from my bed in the middle of the night by "men in black" types for my wanton disregard for the government!

I have this habit of signing petitions to halt the current administration from drilling in the arctic, displacing animals like wolves and the such, pushing for global warming legislation, and most recently, allowing free travel to and from Cuba. I've even aligned myself with those locos at PETA during the whole Michael Vick situation. I'm ALWAYS fighting on the side of anti-Big Oil and Tobacco companies- I'm just asking for a beat down huh?

Not to mention I suspect my landlord is a member of Al-Qaeda...why is he always in the garage at 2AM?? Hmmmm...

I just know my name is on a list somewhere, and they're just waiting, biding their time until they bring me in and...god, I don't know, what do they do to folks like me? I've never bombed anything, or joked about bombing anything. I mean there was that time in college that me and a friend plotted to rob a cash checking place and then run away to Chile to avoid prison and our student loan repayments, but that's it!

Okay, maybe once in a while I talk shit about the government when I'm inebriated...who doesn't? This ain't DR circa 1955! It's not like the SIM is gonna come for me and take me to the cane fields and teach me to respect the Bushillato. Or are they?? Part of me kind of suspects that this is exactly the kind of administration we're dealing with- DON'T SLEEP! We just don't hear about it 'cuz they are that good.

I mean who do you think trains those bad asses killing folks all over the world, overthrowing governments left and right?

C'mon, we all know Bush and his peeps are MAD GANGSTA, and one day I'm going to be on the phone calling him and his dad country-ass pricks and then *BOOM* my door will be busted in by some S.W.A.T. folks and...that's it- no more Jaded NYer. Then they'll dump me somewhere in Da Heightz and, just like Dave Chappelle said, sprinkle some crack all over my dead body and call it a drug-related incident.

Country-ass bastard pricks!

*smooches...wondering if all that acid is fucking with my brain*
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The tree is happy because it is scarcely sentient;
the hard rock is happier still, it feels nothing:
there is no pain as great as being alive,
no burden heavier than that of conscious life.