I Wish I Had A Rabbit In A Hat With A Bat

But more than anything, I wish I had more time!!!

Here's what's doin' and brewin' on my mind:

So What Else Is New?
Every one I spoke to on Friday was all up in arms about the cops getting off on the Sean Bell shooting case. If you remember, my position on the incident was this, but also- read the name on the page... I was not expecting anyone to do any time on a case where The Boys in Blue shoot a black man on the streets of NYC. So excuse me if I ho-hummed through the rest of my day.

I know I should care, and I feel for his family and I'm disillusioned about our justice system, but for me it was like, "Cops got acquitted? Oh.. it must be Friday..." Plus Al Farton was up in there talking his usual brand of loose bowel movement, and y'all know how much I LOATHE that greezy muthafucka *growls*

I just do what I need to do to stay under the radar with law enforcement. And not to point a finger at the victim but, hey- you hang out in shady places with shady people, you can't expect your days to be carefree.

Newsflash: Tax Evasion Ain't No Joke
I don't feel bad for Wesley Snipes not one bit. Pay yo' damn taxes, fool! Nobody likes to pay it- NOBODY! But until we can do something about that... PAY YO' GOD DAMNED TAXES! And I don't want to hear the old, "well, his financial advisers are the ones who fucked him over..." Whatever, man!

My mom, a very wise and learned accountant, always told me: be careful what you sign, read everything including and especially the fine print, and follow your money everywhere it goes. I suppose Wes' mom forgot to tell him that. Hey Wes- a word of advice? Don't drop the soap...

I Quit. Finito. Me Fui.
I need money like John Travolta needs to come out of the closet, but these freelance gigs are killing me slow. So I'm quitting. I have to. I never have any time to just BE anymore. It's always, "We need this in a week" or "Can you turn that over in two days?" and in the meantime my 9-5 stays giving me gray hair and my house is literally upside down and I'm TIRED!! So I'm letting two of my clients know that I can no longer work for them. I think it will be better for me to only have one or two side gigs...then maybe I won't feel so stressed. In terms of money, well, I'll just have to cut back on spending...

Can I Please Have This Baby?
I saw this video on MySpace TV and OMG- it melted my Jaded little heart!! This baby is so freakin' adorable it should be illegal! As in cops should bust into his place and grab that guitar out of his hand and and squeeze his cheeks to death! And if it doesn't make you smile then you are the Anti-Christ!



It's Official- I'm Turning Into My Mom
I'm already aware of the fact that I inherited her stankness and "whatever" attitude, but I really realized that I was just like her when the thought of having company over made me utter the words: "I don't want people in my house!" Mari- is it me or was that Mom taking over my powers of speech right quick? HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

There Is Such A Thing As Being "Too Big"
I'm not the kind of girl who discusses or elaborates on such things in a public forum, but I did feel that, as a public service announcement, because I love you all so much, you should know that bigger, is not always better. And bigger could quite possibly rip you in two, make your extremities lose all sensation and send you to the ER. That's all I'm sayin...

*smooches...enjoying my last day and a half as a bachelor*
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seriously, when the babies aren't here, I live like a single man with no home training- dishes all piled up, leaving my clothes all over the place, fridge empty as all hell, bathroom sink a hot mess... in other words, the good life! HA HA HA!!!

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Title courtesy of Skee-Lo, "I Wish"