I swear... you people act like The Terminator, Eagle Eye and I, Robot never existed with your blatant openness and willingness to lick technology's balls.
Why is that?
Is it really that hard to put down the Blackberry? Think back to 5, hell ONE year ago when you didn't have it. How did you live your life? Probably less distracted. And happy.
And can we discuss this newfangled way to keep your eye doctor's pool boy employed, the Kindle? Really? So sitting in front of a computer screen all day is not enough for you, you want to sit in front of a screen all through the night, too, right? Because GOD FORBID you have to hold a real book in your hands, OOF- that's soooo inconvenient.
Or how about the locator chips inserted into unsuspecting animals? Ever think Fluffy is trying to run away for a reason? Didn't I read somewhere humans were next? Oh, fabulous... I can't wait to get my barcode on the back of my neck 'cause you know, deep down, I've always wanted to know what it felt like to be a Jew in Nazi Germany!
Let's not even get into this hot ghetto mess of a "breakthrough" from "scientists" who need to stop being "...so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should." [OOOH, I love that line... name the movie for a month of FREE MOVIES from moi... and Netflix. First one gets it!]:
But I mean, really? Is this necessary? People are developing shit so we don't have to think for ourselves or utilize our brains or anything? This is the future you want?? I won't lie- I'm the first fool to Google someone I've just met but DAMN, right in their face? And really? You need a computer to tell you what the best deal on paper towel is? Didn't you learn MATH in SCHOOL?
Listen- I don't know about you but I'm going to fight the power. And I don't care if I'm the only one who still reads actual BOOKS and thinks for herself. I'll be that one hold out while the world changes around her, making food over an open fire (remember fire? ahhh... good old fire...) and writing things down. With a Bic pen.
So as you bask in the latest gadget by Apple or [insert name of random mad scientist here], ask yourself: how long before those Rumba's you bought to clean your house grow a brain, eat your babies and kill you in your sleep? I'll stick with my old school broom, thank you!
*smooches...thinking of turning this blog into a handwritten, mimeographed weekly newsletter*
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'cause honestly, in a fight between humans and robots, you KNOW we're gonna lose!
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12 comments:
Is it really that hard to put down the Blackberry? Do you really want ME to answer that? Lmao!!!
Yes, it is THAT hard to put it down. That is all.
my wife and i talk about this all the time.
some of this tech has it's uses and some of it is plain ol' let's make some loot.
I like to interact with people IN PERSON. When I am on line at the local supermarket, I talk to the people on line. I crave that interaction. It's organic. Tangible. I think we are losing that. I think the movie Johnnie Mneumonic is really how the future might be.
So... nobody knows where that quote is from? You all shame me...
*sad face*
WELL AIN'T THAT THE POT CALLING THE KETTLE BLACK N' SHIT!
Girl, you can't put your phone down for a second! Really, did you need to be texting peeps while we were out supposedly "running" in the park?
And let's talk about Twitter for a moment...yeah...not much defense against that either missy!
You really want to go against the grain, then here's the challenge to you. I dare you to turn off your phone and computer for a week. That means, no blogging, no twitter, no bootleg shows or movies. NOTHING!
You can't do it. So don't go judging the rest of us. Don't make me come over there and take your cable modem away.
:P
@irene- you missed the point... I'm speaking of USELESS technological advances, stuff I highlighted like the Rumba, Kindle, locator chips and whatever the hell it was that Patty chick was trying to convince me was cool.
Unfortunately, today's society won't allow me to shut off my phone or computer (I need to work & speak to people) but the other stuff, yes, I abuse it profusely. Hence why I take breaks- I recognize that it is detrimental to my brain.
Your challenge doesn't frighten me. You won't be seeing me on social networking sites for the next TWO weeks, and:
*clears throat*
EVERYONE, Thank Irene for a Jaded Blogging Break effective Monday, May 11th. We will resume normal programing on Tuesday, May 26th with (hopefully) crazy birthday pics!:P
Bwahahahahahaha!!! I didn't miss the point. Much the opposite. See, you only want to consider the things you don't use and useless. Maybe not to you, but they maybe be necessary for others. For example: the Kindle is a good tool for those with poor eye sight. It allows those people to be able to read books without th strain of reading small sprint. Secndly, it allows you to carry more than one book at a time. I have 9 books in one of my classes which I have to bring regularly. One girl in my class has a Kindle and it has all of the books uploaded to it. So, instead of carrying 9 books, a notebook, etc..she carries one little thing. Lucky girl.
And we all know that Twitter, Facebook, Lala, and all those other things are very neccesary. :P
And yes, you could turn off your phone (for other than work and emergencies), don't give me that "I need to speak to people" crap!
BTw..locator chips are usefull if your animal gets stolen or lost or runs away. It helps get them back.
So unless you are finishing your thesis or sending out resumes, your computer IS NOT NECESSARY.
And yeah...Rumba's are just a way to make people lazy. Cause you know, we ain't lazy enough.
See ya later.
See, you only want to consider the things you don't use useless.as is my right as a selfish, vain, arrogant and spoiled American. Especially on my blog...
LOL! You got that right biatch!!!
*dances a jig, hoping no one notices I keep Gmail open all the live-long day*
The quote is from Jurassic Park. Though I already have a membership to Netflix (love it!) so, if anyone else wants it, I'll be happy to pass my winnings along.
I have a love/hate relationship with Kindle and other readers. I'm a book girl, work in publishing, will never pass up the feel of a book in my hands for some electronic anything. However, my stepmom has MS and the Kindle has been her saving grace. When her eyesight goes falters or her tremors get bad, she can't handle a book but the Kindle works just fine.
I don't even have a blackberry but I can't go no where without my itouch I would go crazy if I lost it.
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