Friends, Romans, countrymen, permit me to get some angryness off my chest real quick...
I hate nothing more on this planet than for people to not tell me when they have an issue with me. I've been guilty of doing the same to others, but whatever, I hate it lots and lots when it's done to me.
If, for whatever reason, your feelings for me have changed, it would have been nice to hear that from your lips. And in this technologically advanced world, honestly, I would have even accepted a text, IM or email. Hell, even Berger had the "decency" to give Carrie the infamous Post-It note.
It's the guessing games, backstabbing and radio silence that just isn't right.
Could this be payback for the times I've done it to others? Probably. But it still feels like shit and I'm not sure I deserve it. In fact, I know I don't. I worked so hard to evict Depression and in one swift non-move you invited it back. I know that after I'm done sulking and crying and isolating myself from you I will be fine because I've done it before and frankly, I don't have a choice. I still have a life to lead, a career to salvage and kids to raise. And in the end you will just be a footnote in the book of my life.
For now, though, please excuse me as I drown myself in some Ani DiFranco, work, sun-bathing, cheesy movies and back issues of Martha Stewart Living.
*smooches...secure in the notion that I still have real friends in this world*
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And as I write this, I'm watching Hav Plenty with a big ol smile on my face (HAVILAND: Lee, how come you've never tried to kiss me? LEE: Because you have psychological problems), so my world isn't all shitty all the time. this is all temporary and I know it.
PS- this song, Adam & Eve, is the one that inspired the tattoo on my back, with its lyric: "I just happen to like apples and I'm not afraid of snakes"
Don't you just LOVE IT?!?!
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6 comments:
I have a problem with you.
You have better legs than I do.
There!
"The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us." - Voltaire
*written while lounging at the beach - don't hate. LOL!*
You've brought out the big guns! HavPlenty? Wow. As far as folks having problems with you, sheeeit, that's their problem, shake that shit off and keep it moving!
@irene- now doesn't if feel good to get that off your chest?! lol
@smarty- I love that film so much! What ever happened to him? Let me go google his yellow behind and see what's what...
You know how I feel about that sh$T, Say it to my face or don't say it at all. Cowards and Yenta's relay messages through others.
so to this person I think you need to just say "Poof Vamoss son of a B!"
You can thank Jay for that.
I got a problem with you. You're so much more eloquent in your righteous anger than I could ever hope to be. Like Ani, you put words to those feelings that usually just leave me speechless.
Since you're talking about song lyrics, something about this post made me think of the song Shirly, by L7.
It's about Shirley Muldowney, the only female in this drag race. When she not only wins but sets a new track records, the announcer (a man) asks her, "What's a beautiful girl like you doing racing in a place like this."
Her response?
Winning.
@the f$%k it list- easier said than done, but I will add Jay to my ipod this week to see if it helps
@kelly- L7! God I haven't listened to them in ages; thanks for the reminder (and the compliment)
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