Blissful Ignorance

Those of you who follow me on Twitter and Facebook are probably tired of me singing the praises of the film Adam (read my Jaded Review here), but I have to mention it one more time because it inspired this blog post. Bear with me, OK?

So I'm watching Adam (after Nina & I got rained out of our reggae beach party plans... Damn You, New England weather!) and without spoiling too much of the film for you, one character discovers that the person they admired the most is a fraud. But not so much a fraud as much as they are flawed.

This made me think about something my mom told me once about Grandma during one of her many, "Let's Kill Raquel's Self-Esteem & Sense of Worth" sessions. Mami said that Grandma, upon learning that Mami was pregnant, kicked her out of the house and disowned her, that everyone wanted her to NOT have me (including herself, remember? From Monday's post?). And when she first said that to me it stung real bad. Grandma was my world; how could she not want me?

But as a kid (smart one that I was) I decided, you know what? Grandma has been nothing but AWESOME to me. Whatever happened then happened between the two of them and it's none of my business. Grandma remained steadily perched on her pedestal.

Then there was the time I witness Papi beat the crap out of my uncle, whipped him like a slave LITERALLY, leaving huge welts on his back. Mind you, Papi hadn't (and still hasn't) ever raised his hand in anger or punishment against any of us girls (well, except Minnie & Nancy, but they were asking for it) so to watch him be so ruthless was a shock to my little brain. Again, however, I rationalized it- Perhaps my uncle did something so terrible that it warranted a whooping of that magnitude. Surely Papi wouldn't do that just for kicks?

So this begs the question: At what point do we see the people in our lives for who they really are rather than as how it best suits us? Is their image forever tarnished in our memories? Or do we love them regardless? Is it our place to forgive wrongs that had nothing to do with us? And how can we continue to worship these heroes, flaws and all? Or did I just answer my own questions right there?

*smooches...loving when a great movie inspires great debate*
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so speak on it people- what say you about tarnished heroes??