Each day, my psyche hangs in the balance. I stand on the precipice of "valued contributing member of society" and "bed restraints and padded rooms" at any given moment. I know it, you know it, and we joke about it all the time: "Hahaha, Jaded's crazy." But, no, really, I am.
I suppose the scariest part of that revelation is that I see myself going crazy. There's this sane part of me that stands outside of myself and watches the crazy part of me slowly lose it. During this descent I'm powerless. I can't do anything to stop it. I can only sit there and I watch as I go crazy.
And I suppose the real question in my mind is... how much longer before the crazy takes over the sane and there is no more "functional" me left?
*sigh*
I don't want this brain anymore; it's defective.
*smooches...wondering why Wednesdays make me so melancholy*
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this blog post was brought to you by the fact that Sancocho Wednesday had to be canceled because my job sucks big donkey dick.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
up, DOWN, uuuuup, DOWWWWWN
Labels:
A Life in Shambles,
Bellevue Calling,
Jobs,
Ramblings,
Revelations,
The Voices
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4 comments:
I'm reading a book now that you might be able to appreciate. It kind of speaks to this post. It's by Walter Mosley. It's a short novel entitled, Diablerie.
@rich- Yeah, I've read it before. Thanks for the recommendation though
I'm gonna need the blue feelings to exit. You'll learn to make that yummy soup another time, not quite a reason to let the crazy out.
As for the gig, didn't it always suck? Not much can change if you're still connected to that dreadful man. So cross your fingers that all your other ventures pay off soon so you can yell in his FACE "Poofff Vamoose Son of a Bitch"
That was funny. You have a great sense of humor. In fact, I almost believed every word and emotion expressed. Then I had to catch myself cause there is no way a great mom, a nurturer, daughter, sister, friend, comedian, lover of life and survivor such as yourself can be on the verge of a mental asylum.
Nice try, Rocky.
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