Mommy- 1, Capitalism- 0

I've been very vocal about the hard economic times that has befallen my household, so bad it is that I can't even buy my kids a damn Christmas present. And it's not that I'm the type of parent that buys my kids' love and affection, but they've been really good girls. They've gone without this entire year because of my poor choices and I just wanted to give them one special day and something nice to unwrap on that day. It's killing me to know that on Christmas morning they will not have anything from me to open. It's KILLING me.

But I'd stretched my money as far as it was gonna stretch and there is just no room for gifts, not if we want to eat and have gas to cook with and electricity and internet access.

I knew K would be strong about it; she's 14, she knows the deal. It sucks, but she knows the deal. I was mostly worried about N, whom I try to keep away from such grown-up matters because she's a true 9-year-old, not a fast-ass'd grown one, and I'd like for her to enjoy this age without thinking about my money problems.

However, I knew I had to prep her for Christmas, let her know in advance that we've all had a hard year so she may not get what she's used to getting but should be thankful that we can all be together for the entire weekend in her grandmother's new house.

And you know what she said to me?

"As long as we're all together as a family."

I almost cried.

Of course I know she'd love the gifts but how mature and just SWEET of her to say just all of us together at Mami's was enough? That just makes me want to buy her more stuff than she can ever have time to play with!

So fuck you, Toys R Us and all your cronies for making me feel like less of a parent because I can't purchase for her the latest, greatest toy that will end up broken and disregarded by February. We don't even need any of you, as long as we're all together as a family.

*smooches...learning so much about this kid everyday*
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she really does surprise me every time she opens her mouth...