Thursday, January 21, 2010

Philanthropically Speaking

It seems like every year or two there is a devastating natural disaster that calls on those who have to open their hearts and, if they can and want, give to those who have not.

And I don't say that to trivialize any of the recent events that have taken hundreds of thousands of lives and created who knows how many orphans and homeless families. I just want you to re-read that first sentence again, especially the part that says "if they can and want."

Why do I call that part out? Because I've noticed a particularly distasteful trend on Twitter, FB and blogland of guilting or shaming people into donating money to various charities aiding the Haitian people.

I am absolutely of the belief that once I "make it" I should give back and pull up my brothers and sisters still in the struggle. Sometimes you'll hear me say that when my media empire blows up I'm bringing you with me, and I mean that. And I also have a list of charities near and dear to my heart that will receive annual donations, grants and/or endowments from me and the media empire, above and beyond whatever it is I do, or don't do for them now.

You won't see me list them or call them out, though, because I am also of the belief that philanthropy is a personal, private matter. Whom I give to and how much I give is none of anybody's business, except maybe Uncle Sam (that nosy, greedy motherfucker!) and my Mami (who will be in charge of my loot) and my lawyers/estate planners/beneficiaries.

The rest of you can STEP w/the guilt trips and obnoxious GIVE NOW tweets and status messages. If you gave, that's awesome. Beautiful. Haiti needs more people like you right now and from now on. Does that mean you can rub it in others' faces, like those somma-time Catholics that LIVE for Ash Wednesday so that they can flaunt their "faith" to the outside world? Please. I hope not.

Last week while on the phone with Nina I said I wouldn't write about this tragedy in Ayiti because it's a personal matter, and I didn't feel that I had to share anything about it with you. Especially what, if anything, I've done to help my people across that 193 mile border. You don't know me like that. Yeah, you read this blog and I pour about 85% of my real life onto this site for your reading pleasure, but please don't ever mistake it for KNOWING. ME. LIKE. THAT. I would never presume the same about you.

But the reason for this rant (because you know I always have a reason) is that yesterday someone made a snide comment asking why was Oprah Winfrey concerned w/what Wyclef Jean was donating to Haiti when she has enough money and should be giving, too. It struck a nerve because what AUDACITY to tell someone what to do with their own hard-earned money. How do we know what Ms. Winfrey has or hasn't done for Haitian relief efforts, and why does she have to, AND why is it our business, just because she isn't screaming it from the mountaintops? Fall back, SON!

YES what happened, and its aftermath, is HORRIBLE, and this country, these people, those BABIES, need help from wherever it may come. But getting all high and mighty, holier-than-thou with other people's wallets? Who the fuck are you?

Listen, give, don't give. Help, don't help. Just do what your conscious is comfortable with, not what a somma-timer says you should do. Chances are in a month, many of these same people will forget that Haiti even exists. Just like they forgot about Louisiana, and just like they forgot about those areas near the Indian Ocean.

*hops off soapbox and throws it at Twitter*

And another thing: don't EVER, IN YOUR LIFE, tell me what to do. EVER.

*smooches...especially after the tongue lashing I just gave you*
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only a small part of this was directed at one person so don't try to start no online beef...it's something that has been bothering me since the 13th and I've tried to hold it in but yesterday, man, a spark was lit and I couldn't find my fire extinguisher...

11 comments:

Tiffany S. Jones said...

*sticks head in* Is it safe?
First of all, who in hell is anyone to be making plans with other people's money?
Last week, folks were up in arms about Beyonce "only" giving $250K. The fuck you mean, "only?"
My point is, if you can give, plan to give, do it because you want to, not because you want some mofo to recognize you for it.
Hell, giving to be recognized is the opposite of what you're doing anyway. The object is to raise awareness about the issue, the people, the plight. It's not to grow your damn popularity or win people over.
And who the fuck would question Oprah's philanthropic work anyway? Do you have any idea how much she gives and convinces other people to give every year? Pssh! That's that bullshit.

and1grad said...

Well said. I'm tired of Twitter activism in general.

Marielys said...

I totally agree. I felt the same way on twitter last week. I have been doing my things but it really is not necessary for the whole world to know, praise me, etc. Everyone kept scrutinizing on the gossip shows what each celeb was "doing" for Haiti. Although I grew up in church and have fully bought in to the giving and charitable heart, I love this one scripture that says to ' not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing'. POINT BLANK: Do your good deeds and then shut your mouth and stop trying to get brownie points from others ;-)

my 20 cents,
M

Don said...

Wow.....

MzVirgo said...

Well, I agree. If you donated, then keep that to yourself. There is no need to gloat or to make anyone feel guilty for not doing so. And I am tired of hearing about how much a celebrity gave. The ones that donate quietly are the ones I like the most.

Tyrone said...

Well said. I put in my little bit, and RT'd a message or two. But badgering others to give is a no-no.

I'd like to give more, who wouldn't? But let me make sure my bills are paid, how about that?

The F_Uitlist said...

GIVE GIVE GIVE!!!! hahahahah

I am not one to tell people what to do with their money or their time, because I'll be damned if someone tells me what to do with mine. I find the fact that someone that going on and on about Oprah's money and what she does is their business or any celeb for that matter.

What upset me more was the tweets w/the articles about what Wyclef and Yele have done with the funds, STFU already. This man left his family and was one of the first on the ground working to save lives. Too many people are worried about others and not themselves.

ok GIVE GIVE GIVE GIVE, HAITI HAITI HAITI hahah. I can't stop myself.

TheUncertainMan.com said...

Amen.. this shit pisses me off to no end.

I'd love to donate to the needy when I no longer feel like I'm one of them..

*disclaimer* - I know I'm not needy, I have a roof over my head, and I'm not hungry. But I do feel like a broke-ass mofo.

That said - I did donate to Haiti. How much? NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS! that's how much.

This post reminds me of the proclivity on Facebook for inviting friends to support various "causes"... I'll sign up to support your "Single dads with baby momma issues" cause, and "Midget Autistic Circus Employees" cause when you sign up to support my "Married with two kids, one income, college-educated Spaniard" cause. Until then, leave me the fuck alone... I treat those like Farmville requests.

Tyrone said...

God, I don't miss the causes app. I blocked the hell out of that thing. It was impossible to keep up with...and preachy as hell.

Reina said...

I happen to be one of these bleeding heart people, and it takes a lot for me to keep from donating sometimes.

I am of the mind though that it's not something that requires bragging, and though I will beg for causes that are dear to me, I don't judge what someone gives or what someone doesn't.

I bought shoes this weekend. I could've donated that money, but I wanted those shoes!

Giving is personal. Had Haiti been Puerto Rico, you could catch me on the corner with a tin can begging for donations. Who am I to judge anyone when I won't do that for Haiti?

The Jaded NYer said...

@smarty- someone chastised Beyonce for giving "only" 250K? I cannot... 250K is a shitload of money! Greedy bastards...

@and1grad- you and me both, homie

@mari- THIS: "not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing" is why you rock!

@don- speechless, are you?

@mzvirgo- the quiet philanthropists are my favorite, too.

@tyrone- thing is you shouldn't even have to explain about paying your bills first. It's no one's business. And anyone who'd chastise you for not wanting to be homeless & hungry in order to HELP the homeless and hungry can eat a dick!

@the f$%k it list- see...why you always gotta be the trouble maker?? lol

@ricardo- I'm still chuckling at "proclivity" LMAO!!!!!

@reina- I agree; had it been DR I would have been beside myself, but I wouldn't have DEMANDED anything from anyone. Some people just need to learn tact. Not everyone knows what it is.